Surviving X Thriving + Guilt & Gratitude
When life began to change rapidly due to the pandemic and I had to accept that I would have to make adjustments to my daily routine, business strategy, and survival tactics (in which I never had a comprehensive guide for to begin with) I kept telling myself,
“I am not giving up on 2020.”
Could I have been overly optimistic that social distancing would only be a thing for a few months or maybe in denial that something like this could happen at a time when the seeds I planted seasons ago were on the brink of blooming, right after my company’s launch event? As the weeks started to shift from frantic preparation to rising death tolls, the reality of being still, surviving, and trusting God’s plan became the new 2020 strategy.
“Remember there is always a reason to praise.”
– Bishop Joseph W. Walker III
In pursuit of not giving up hope, I found new forms of gratitude. One being more time. Unless you’re a healthcare hero or essential worker, more than likely your transportation time has been reduced, your non-virtual social calendar canceled, and your morning prep time cut in half. Yay! More time to invest in you!
I personally have allocated more time for creativity while becoming more self-sufficient. Who knew I could take such great photos with my cell phone on a mini tripod?! Canva and Photoshop Fix both deserve a shoutout for becoming my power team. Although creating graphics and retouching photos is additional work, it’s relieving to not have to send notes back and forth to a freelancer for projects I can do own my own.
In April, I filmed my first live interview series, ‘The Business Brake’ LIVE. It gave me the opportunity to reconnect with my network virtually while motivating me to show up camera ready every Thursday. Keep in mind, doing my own hair months at a time is a complete struggle but miracles happen every day.
I began to see new beauty from the safety of my home. Spending more time alone than usual has enhanced my appreciation for the environment around me. I feel more in community with the earth and even have a favorite tree. I’m naturally an animal person and lover of the environment but being in a space where it can get really lonely, I take solace in the fact that a bird built a nest outside of my work window and the squirrels have parties on my roof.
While in gratitude, I can’t dismiss the grief. To see the worldwide fatalities resulting from Covid-19 is difficult to accept. How can this disease be so violent and disproportionately kill certain groups? It’s unfair.
Survivor’s guilt fuels my reason to stay home. My prayers go out to everyone fighting for their life and for those who have lost family members.
I also think of the individuals who are struggling to provide the essentials and home schooling for their children. In former President Obama’s 2020 High School Commencement Speech, he thoughtfully noted, “Even families that are relatively well-off are dealing with massive uncertainty. Those who were struggling before, they’re hanging on by a thread.”
Mother’s Day weekend I shared a snippet of my quarantine life in a vlog where I mentioned my quarantine food, especially organic food, going to waste because I can’t eat it fast enough. To be able to have more than enough food, the option to work from home, save money due to staying at home, and own essential businesses can be viewed as thriving in these times.
“Stay at home” has been no work vacation for me but life is good overall. There’s a lot left of 2020 and since last year was pretty amazing, I’m only trying to go from glory to glory.